We saw the last one from Gendry

63 things I yelled at the Game Of Thrones Season 8 premiere

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SPOILERS, people. It is clear.

1. Hi folks, it's me, your GoT man. You remember my reviews from last season, don't you?

2. In fact, I hardly remember myself, because the last Game of Thrones episode ran in 2017. AND NOW IT'S 2019.

3. I aged a lot while waiting for Season 8. I got a long beard. I'm Robin Williams in Jumanji who doesn't know what year it's currently.

4. But here we are now. And finally, finally, we can see the first episode of the LAST season of our favorite series about dragons and incest.

5. I just hope the servers don't crash.

6. Let's see ... the last time we looked, Dany and Jon were banging on a boat, Viserion blew a hole in the wall, Tormund was there, which wasn't good for Tormund, Jaime got Cersei den Stinkefinger showed and ran north, and Arya and Sansa finally got rid of Littlefinger. That's basically it, isn't it?

7. OMG, the servers are running, LET'S GO!

8. A new place on the map: “Last Hearth” (in German “the last hearth”). Looks ... snowy.

9. Whoa, check out the new intro. I love all the details.

10. I would like to have such a small Iron Throne that is cool. For that I would really let something jump.

11.Arya looks so utterly unimpressed by the Immaculate,

12. JON AND DANY! Aunt and nephew have never looked so good together.

13. OH MY GOD, Arya has already seen the bloodhound AND Gendry and it's not been eight minutes yet.

14. Tyrion has also spoken of eggs at least three times, and we are still not much further than five minutes.

15. The scene with the dragons over Winterfell. YES!

16. I think it's great how it is clear to all the Stark siblings that Bran is now .. well .. a bit strange.

17. He's also really good at killing the mood, hahaha.

18. These days the noble houses are run by so many children.

19. Lord Umber can't hold a candle to Lyanna fucking Mormont though. She flexes as blatantly as always.

20. Oh Tyrion has something to say again ...

21. "And soon the Lannister army will ride north and join us ..." - "BUUUUUUUUUUH!"

22. Oh, I had completely forgotten that today is the first time Tyrion and Sansa will meet again in a long time.

23. Between "... which depends on the Queen" and "He had his moments", Sansa is back in top form today.

24. I could literally watch Arya and Jon talk about swords for an hour.

25. Ah, I forgot how much I hate Euron.

26. But I love the way Cersei asks about elephants.

27. "Have you brought me elephants?" - "Madam, we came here on boats, what do you think?"

28. Poor Bronn. Not a castle and now he's being cock-blocked by Qyburn.

29. AND now is he supposed to kill Tyrion? No thanks.

30. There's something about the crossbow.

31. WHOOOOA THEON, WHAT'S ON.

32. The boy is finally doing something right.

33. He still deserved the nutshell.

34. I really hope Asha's “... but kill the pigs anyway!” Becomes part of her official motto.

35. “They make a lovely couple indeed!” You will all be so disappointed, haha.

36. “They don't like the north.” Yes. Ooo or but your brother just died AND YOU ARE SAD DAENERYS.

37. JON WILL RIDE A DRAGON!

38. I have to say, this Stark cape flaps beautifully in the wind!

39. It reminds me a bit How to train your dragon.

40. Well more likely Taming latently depressed, murderous dragons made easy.

41. Young woman, don't be joking about hiding in a cave with Jon. He already knows that.

42. “You're an ice cold little beast, aren't you?” I think is as close to a compliment from the bloodhound as possible.

43. Arya and Gendry are so sugary, I can't stand it.

44. Arya has blueprints for fancy weapons. She's 100 percent Batman now.

45. Am I wrong, or is Haus Glauer just causing problems?

46. ​​“No, she's a lot prettier!” You see? Sansa on fire!

47. Sam, asking for a pardon for his bib fees, is just too cute.

48. Oh. my. God. Poor Sam. My heart. However, it's also a bit funny because the scene appeals to me Robin Hood - hero in tights remind.

49. It was just as uncomfortable as I imagined. Uff.

50. Oh, and now that Sam just found out that his dad and brother got roasted, should HE tell Jon he's having sex with his aunt?

51. At least he did it quite dramatically.

52. “You were never a bastard. You are Aegon Targaryen, the true heir to the Iron Throne. ”GOOSE SKIN.

53. Poor Jon. All he really wanted was to live on the wall and maybe become a border guard and ride a few horses. Now look at him.

54. Oh thank God! Tormund lives!

55. Beric too, but that's less important to me.

56. Beric can light his sword with fire magic and he uses it to light a torch. Absolutely legendary.

57. THE CHILD. TURN AROUND!

58. AGE ....

59. Great. Check it out That happens when the children have to run the houses.

60. The bearded traveler Jaime somehow looks even hotter.

61. Oh no, he will meet Bran.

62. The episode had some unpleasant encounters, but this one is the most unpleasant.

63. Uff.

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This article first appeared in English.